Why we need Nick Kyrgios at the Olympics
Our 10 million dollar kid, Bernard Tomic, has decided against going to the Rio Olympics.
It was a decision he made ‘with a heavy sense of regret’ but necessary due to his ‘extremely busy playing schedule’ and ‘personal circumstances’.
Basically, he’s not about to take any nonsense from the Australian Olympic team’s Chef de Mission, Kitty Chiller.
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Chiller put him and Nick Kyrgios ‘on watch’ for their bad behaviour last week and warned them that further outbursts could see them ignored for the Olympics.
But, perhaps reading the play, Tomic made the decision for her.
He has got too much on, and understandably so.
There’s the French Open, Wimbledon and Queen’s in the months ahead.
He’ll also play a tournament in Los Cobos, Mexico, to defend a title he won when it was played in Bogota, Colombia last year.
It’s only a second-tier tournament but Tomic also won it in 2014 after management company IMG dumped him.
He needs to do well in the tournament due to the way tennis’ ranking system works.
Without Rio, he can then rest in August and approach the US Open with confidence.
Bernard Tomic has decided against the Olympics. Photo: Getty
Perhaps he can squeeze through to the second week, top up the bank account with a couple of hundred thousand, sink a few Harvey Wallbangers in downtown Manhattan, and be back on the Gold Coast for Schoolies’ week.
They’ll be no time to tank with the cashed-up kiddies in town.
With a bit of luck, he’ll then be off to the Shanghai Masters, and another big pay day.
He may even pick up a real Rolex on the way.
Come Christmas he’ll be back on the Gold Coast with perhaps 11 million in the bank.
So, let’s cut Bernie some slack.
Despite a few form flutters, he’s a player ranked in the 20-somethings.
At this stage he hasn’t got the game or the tank to take him higher, nor win a medal, but that might change.
He doesn’t need the Olympics, and he certainly doesn’t need Australia’s Chef de Mission, Kitty Chiller, telling him to make his bed in the morning.
If Kyrgios has got any sense, he’ll do the same in coming weeks.
He’s rude and a loose cannon, but this kid has got a tweener shot and he puts bums on seats.
As a tantrum thrower, he’s better than John McEnroe.
As a player, he brings NBA razzle-dazzle and athleticism to the staid world of tennis.
Olympic Chef de Mission Kitty Chiller had strong words for Australia’s top men’s tennis players. Photo: AAP
He doesn’t put overheads away. Kyrgios slam dunks them.
Kyrgios gave Chiller what she deserved the other day – a serve on social media.
After Chiller warned the boys to be on their best behaviour if they want a bed in the village, Kyrgios reminded her of his tweener.
Touche, Nick. Nice return down the line. You don’t need Chiller telling you to clean your room.
If Kyrgios follows Tomic’s lead, it’s going to be a dull 16 days in Brazil.
Perhaps a swimmer or two might go off the rails, or a synchronized swimmer could lose a nose plug and give us all a laugh.
Someone will surely throw punch in a pub and be sent to their room by Chiller.
So Nick, if you’re in the vicinity, drop in on the Games.
It won’t be the same without your old sparring partner, Bernie, and we don’t want the white bread brigade – Sam Groth, John Millman and those losers.
Peter Allen-like, go to Rio and show Kitty your tweener, and give us all a good laugh.
We’re going to need it.