The shoe maketh the man … just ask our Prime Minister

As we all know by now, Prime Minister Scott Morrison made headlines for his family portrait last week, which included a major Photoshop fail that left him with two left feet.
Apparently someone in Department of Prime Minister and Cabinet – without the knowledge of, or authorisation by, the PM or the PM’s office – decided that Morrison’s slightly worse-for-wear K Swiss trainers needed an update, so they decided to do it in post-production
Hindsight is wonderful thing. But it seems to me it would have been far easier for the stylist on the shoot to say ‘Hey, why don’t we buy a more pristine pair before we start?’, but that’s just me being practical.
K Swiss sneakers sell for about $55 online, so it wasn’t like they had to get onto a waitlist at Louis Vuitton or anything like that. Shoe-gate flooded the internet for a day or so, which was a shame for two reasons: One, that I had to look at Morrison’s awful check shirt a few more times than I would have liked; two, because there was far more interesting male shoe action over at the Golden Globes.
While Mr Morrison reminded us yet again just how jarring ‘ordinary’ can be, there was gorgeous gender-bending Australian actor Cody Fern lighting up the red carpet in perfect day-into-night make-up and a sheer black shirt, and wearing the iconic Tabi boot by avant garde label Maison Margiela.
The men at the Golden Globes were having fun this year, pushing the usual boundaries of the black-tie suit with polished dress shoes, although there were plenty of those.
If a regular suit appeared, it was tailored and tapered to within an inch of its life, with contrasting satin collars, or in all velvet (Lucas Hedges and John C. Reilly), worn with paisley scarves (Mahershala Ali) or decked out with sparkling Cartier jewellery.
The shoe is, of course, the make or break of any outfit, and there was one young actor who in my mind knocked it out of the park sartorially.
Stephan James had all the boxes ticked – his velvet suit was Ralph Lauren Purple label, the top label in the Lauren universe and the most expensive. The suit fit like a glove and James added a beautiful starburst brooch by Chopard as a lapel pin.
But the real game changers were his fabulous Christian Louboutin dress shoes. They were a very classic black leather dress shoe, but the tapered toe featured lavish embroidered gold detailing.
It was a Napoleonic flourish that delivered him best dressed in my opinion (Chadwick Boseman came in second with his fabulous sparkling silver jewelled loafers).
Maybe poor Scott Morrison’s family portrait would have served him better if the photoshopper had used a little more imagination. A pair of Air Jordans? A Balenciaga boot?
Maybe the Virgil Abloh for Louis Vuitton sequinned harness that Timothee Chalamet wore to the Golden Globes could have added a certain je ne sais quoi to that ghastly Rivers short-sleeved check shirt, because a fake white sneaker certainly didn’t.